Sunday, July 24, 2016

How to Avoid Blaming Politicians and Assume Responsibility for Our World

Peace. Happiness. That is what many of us are searching for, in our lives, in our communities, in the world. How can we achieve it, when every week there is news, in the United States of police shootings resulting in needless deaths, or people shooting at police and killing them in retaliation, and around the world, in France, in Germany, in Syria, in Afghanistan, Belgium - the list extends, it seems, all the time - attacks on people in the street, using whatever weapons are in hand: bombs, firearms, axes, a truck.And the bombings by our own jets in Syria, with again senseless, needless killing of people whose only connection to our intent was there being in the same place as ISIS. I am taking a deep breath and posting some thoughts that I have been developing over the past few years.
Where to start, where to unravel this endless chain or murder, revenge, rage, fear, and cold destruction? Certainly not with dark lectures on excluding the “perpetrators” from our country, certainly not with the continuing stance of bellicosity towards anyone who questions our values. We are so afraid of people imposing their values on us we have become blind to the fact that we are constantly expecting the rest of the world to accept ours, without question. Are we the best country on the planet? In some respects, we have many advantages over other places; however, in other ways, we are not even trying to keep up. Our fear of being deprived of weapons we hardly need, such as assault rifles, for example, has led us down a road towards sociopathy: the thought that we have the right, and the obligation even, of blowing away anyone who threatens what we perceive to be our place in the world, or anyone who we suspect (mostly unjustifiably) of even representing a threat to our identity.  In the middle east, the fear of points of view that could undermine long-held beliefs and lead to the decay of society is equally strong, and equally sociopathic.
So, essentially, we are moving rapidly towards a state of mind that cancels society: everyone else is to blame for our lives, and we are the victims of terrible violence. There is no “either/or” for the vast number of people in this country: if you are a proponent of Black Lives Matter, according to the view of many, you are against the police; if you support the police by recognizing they have a societal role that also must be protected,  you betray the African-Americans, Muslims, and others who are targeted by the police. These opinions are disturbing, and reflect not only schisms in society, but schisms within our individual minds. In the political arena, they have allowed a cold-hearted, apolitical, con-artist reality TV host to become the spokesman for the Republican Party. They have also have allowed Democrats to show the same bigotry as their rivals in attacking Republicans as a whole, further fanning the flames of hate on the part of those who support Trump. Even Barack Obama, who began his presidency extending the olive branch to Republicans and holding out great hope for resolving our differences, has changed his stance on dialogue, criticizing the Republicans openly and often. Recently, a friend of mine wrote to me on Facebook that Obama is even a murderer, responsible for killing of innocent civilians in Syria. My response to him is essentially we need to stop blaming politicians (yes, even Trump) for the dark state of the world.
So who can we blame? Let’s try to move away from blame: it’s part of the cycle of blame, hate, killing, revenge, blame, hate….and so on. Let’s ask another question: who can change this state of the world? Apparently not politicians: they are as much at a loss as anyone. The correct response: we can. I mean “we” in the broadest sense of the word: every single one of us, from the most powerful to the (seemingly) most insignificant. We need to undergo a quiet, steady, sincere revolution to avoid self-destruction. There is nothing new in my saying this: ancient philosophies affirm this, the strongest and most lucid among them being Buddhism. However, time and again the concept of self-reflection, and more, active self-observation, needs to be brought to people’s awareness constantly. A wise woman once told me that what was inhibiting my happiness was the tiny seed of resentment that I allowed myself to cultivate in my relationships. That tiny seed, when nurtured, grows into anger, to deprecation, to thoughts, words, and actions that disseminate negativity: all because I am blaming another person for my own reactions. It denies responsibility for the effect I have on my environment; it is “giving” away what cannot be given: the power to govern my own reactive decisions. If I decide to react negatively, that is my choice. We are so accustomed to affirming our right to choose whatever we wish that we do not consider the ultimate effect: am I creating happiness with my response, or am I making the cause for misery? For example, if someone insults me, or steals from me, or treats me with contempt, will my retaliation create a better environment? Perhaps it would seem so temporarily, because for the moment I may feel appeased, but the energy will continue to vibrate with negative force. If on the other hand I can try a different path, and decide that my actions will remain impeccable, and that I will do whatever I can to surmount this obstacle peacefully, I have created a different path, and have moved towards a resolution. The energy that I am driving into the world is positive.
This positive energy is not “turning the other cheek”, but finding a peaceful solution, whether it is dialogue with the person who i feel has slighted me or some other action that is the opposite of negativity. For me as a practicing Buddhist, this means chanting; for others, it will be meditation, positive prayer. For atheists, it may simply be the driving force of compassion for themselves and for others, but this is very difficult to maintain without a strong philosophy as a basis. I have many atheist friends who maintain that religion of any sort is itself the cause of society’s ills, but this is akin to saying that all Republicans are hopelessly narrow-minded and bigoted: it just is not true. When religion loses the power to self-assess and becomes a tool for fear-mongering is becomes destructive, but religion per se is not evil; in fact, the only goal of religion is the construction of happiness.
My happiness can never be complete without the happiness of those in my environment. Resenting someone else will make me unhappy because I do not have the happiness of that person as my goal. The constant desire to feel superior to others, to be better than others, will never lead to personal happiness, because it does not take into account that our lives are intimately connected, and that in order to live well as human beings we need to consider that each of us is as important as anyone else, regardless of how we are otherwise distinguished from one another, that is, by race, gender, capacity, profession, and so on. The desire to feel superior is fueled by the fear that we ourselves are not adequate. This is the most debilitating of all human obsessions: self-doubt. Self doubt leads to doubting everyone, and that tiny seed of resentment grows to suspicion and hate.  If I have eliminated self-doubt, I can react positively to everything in the world with confidence, and be happy with my decisions, knowing that they will lead to happiness. This will have an effect on my environment, as people will naturally be inspired to make changes in the way they perceive their responsibility towards themselves and others.
So how can we resolve the terrible acts of violence and hatred in the world? By creating millions of positive actions that transform the world, one microcosm, one environment at a time. Stop thinking that politicians will take care of it. Politicians reflect society’s desires and motivations. If our desire is to create more conflict with people who do not think exactly as we do, then we will continue to bring to power people who reflect that. If our desire is for true change, an end to resentment, hate and violence, than our own thoughts and actions will move towards governing bodies who represent that movement. For those who do not practice Buddhism, forgive me if I include a pearl of wisdom from Daisaku Ikeda: "Buddhism teaches that the mind encompasses the entire universe. When we change our innermost state of mind, our whole being changes, and this affects the world in which we live." This is the way forward: to exercise hope against darkness through means of action.

“We’re not a communal nation, dear; giving, but not caring, outgoing but not friendly.” This is line from A Delicate Balance by Edward Albee, which I believe exposes the core of our American malaise: there is a disconnect between the appearances of what we do, and the motivations that drive us. We are willing to give greatly of our resources, but we do not particularly experience someone else’s joy or suffering as our own, or see that joy or suffering as connected to our lives, and we appear to be socially adept, but without the compassionate understanding that builds honest relationships. One more thought before I end this long rant: Again, according to Ikeda, "Each of us is the center of the Universe… Our practice of this wonderful teaching puts us in a position to see that it is the karma we have individually made that puts us where we are, and others where they are, but the truth is we are each able to affect change in our own world, and by extension of the change within us, our environment will also change, including other people within that environment, but the life of each person contains a Buddha, which means everyone is totally worthy of respect due a Buddha, whether they at this moment exhibit the behavior or understanding of being a Buddha…" 
Whether you agree with being a Buddha or not, just know that your own life is as precious as everyone else's, and our relationships are entirely symbiotic, so remember that before kindling the resentment and the anger. We can act positively to thwart evil without those debilitating emotions.

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